


Pretending

by awdirectioners



Category: One Direction
Genre: F/M, One direction AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-05
Updated: 2014-06-06
Packaged: 2018-01-11 06:44:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 22,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1169918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/awdirectioners/pseuds/awdirectioners
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They had warned me that life in the spotlight wasn't what it looked like, that behind someone's career could be lies and things I could never imagine of. No matter though, I refused to listen. I mean how different things could be from the way they seemed? But... I had no idea. The more time passed the more complicated my life was becoming. I was slowly dragging myself into a big horrible lie... into a lie that would ruin everything if it got revealed. I felt like I was in those nightmares where you have to run, run as fast as you can but your feet refuse to listen. The worst part though... this wasn't a nightmare. When did all this start? The day I met Harry Styles.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

“All these little things, make me see, that not falling in love with you was something impossible to do…” I sing again.

“Perfect!” I hear the producer, Tom, say through my headphones once the music is over. I smile big and give him a ‘thumb up’, knowing he can see me through the dark glass. Taking off my headphones and putting them on their place, I get out of the recording booth. 

“Well done, Ash!” My manager David say enthusiastically, his hand up, waiting for a high-five. 

“It’s going to be a-ma-zing!” I reply not trying to hold back my excitement. He laughs and then turns back to Tom, to start editing and mixing my upcoming single “Impossible”. This is the first time I ever work with Tom and I have to admit I wish I had met him earlier. He is really talented! Well, of-course he doesn’t give you this impression just by looking at him, since he is at a very young age, arms covered in tattoos and has a shaved head. 

I remember wondering if my album would have any pop tunes after all, the first time I met him. Feeling a bit guilty, I shake the thoughts away and turn to the third person who is in the room. 

Chris. My boyfriend.

He is holding out his hand for me to take it. I don’t hesitate even for a second, I do so and sit on his lap. His hands move to my waist and mine around his neck. 

“Did I say ‘thank you’ for writing such a beautiful song and dedicating it to me?” He asks and then kisses my neck. 

“Around ten times already.” I answer and he laughs, looking down once he realizes he’s blushing. Adorable. “But I don’t mind.” I quickly add so I can make him feel better even though he knows I’m just joking. When he turns back to me, I give him a peck kiss. 

Taking a deep breath, I sit still just staring into his eyes. Chris; just a couple of years older than me but many inches taller, is the most handsome boy I have ever met. He is quite masculine with pale skin, features that someone would think that don’t look very great together but Chris somehow manages to do so. His eyes is a breath-taking ocean blue and sometimes so dark, you would think that all the oxygen on earth is not enough for you to breathe. His hair is short, straight and dark blonde. He is simply perfect.

He, unlike me, isn’t a singer but an actor. We first met each other two years ago, when my manager David, called him and asked him to play my love interest in my music video for my debut single. He accepted immediately since the show he was staring at, was on hiatus for the summer. He was going to be back on set soon though, to start filming the third season of the famous TV series ‘Torn’. At first I was shy and awkward around him but once we chatted a bit and got to know each other, we realised there was plenty of chemistry between us. So, after plenty of dates at fancy restaurants, movie nights at each other’s place or even just simple walks with his Australian Shepherd, Kyle, we ended up dating. 

“What do you think?” Tom interrupts my thoughts and then plays ‘Impossible’. I listen carefully to every little detail of it so I can tell him afterwards what I liked and what not. When it’s finished, I smile proudly. I have worked really hard for this song and it feels really nice to listen to the final version. “It’s amazing but I think you should turn down the bass a bit when the chorus starts.” He nods and then quickly turns back to his work.

It is already ten o’clock which means we’ve all been here for over than eight hours. We recorded and finished three songs though -with Impossible- and that is quite socking.

Pulling my phone out of my pocket, I open the Twitter app and type quickly: “Another three songs are ready! Can you believe it? My new album is almost done! Can’t wait for you to listen to my first single :)” 

I click the tweet button and then decide to check my mentions and reply to a few of my fans.

@EmRonnie: @AshleyThompson What’s the title of your first single? Please reply to me, it would make my day!

I am thrilled to see my fans excited. I click on ‘reply’ and answer. @AshleyThompson: @EmRonnie I wish I could tell you but then I’d get into a lot of trouble with my record label. Just hang on a few more days x

Another tweet reads: @iLoveTornx: Are you with Chris right now? You guys look so cute together! Tell him that Anna says ‘Hi’ please!

I can feel my cheeks turning red and bite my lip to hide the goofy smile that’s about to appear on my face. Even though it bothers me when interviewers and fans ask me about my personal life, I like this tweet. I mean come on! She thinks we’re a cute couple! 

I reply to her and to a few others and then put my phone back in my pocket. Getting up from Chris’s lap, I move to the couch we have in the studio. I lie down, suddenly feeling very very tired. Closing my eyes, I fall asleep in just a couple of minutes.

\- - -

“Ashley? Ashley! Wake up!” I hear David say and a Chris protesting that ‘I need some sleep since I’ve been up since 5A.M. in the morning’.

I sigh and then cover my face with my hands. “Alright.” David pretends to give up but he sucks at acting. “I won’t tell you who just called me and asked me if you’re available this summer to open their tour.”

I jump up, hyper. “SPEAK UP DAVID!” I shout and throw him a pillow when he shakes his head ‘no’.

“Tell me right now or I’m tweeting the picture I have of you in a floral dress!” Desperate times call for desperate measures and black-mailing David has always been the simplest and funniest way.

David… What can I say about my short and chubby, thirty-years-old manager?

I can never possibly forget the day I met him, three years ago. It was late afternoon in a summer night and I was at a karaoke party with some friends. To be honest, I had never imagined myself as a singer. Yes, I always loved singing, people were telling me I was very good at it but I never thought of it as a possible future career. My life dream had always been more realistic and simple. It was to find someone who I really loved and spend my whole life with him. Maybe I am just a sucker for love. Anyway, I decided to sing that day. I chose Chasing Cars which was one of my favorite songs at the time. When the music started, I forgot about everyone there. I just sang. But when I finished… I will never possibly forget the reactions of the people that were there. That moment… I felt happy and forgot about my marriage/being in love plan. All I wanted was more moments like that. I wanted to sing. I wanted to do that for the rest of my life. And –lucky me- it didn’t take long for the chance to come to my door. After singing at a few events all around my hometown and at all the karaoke nights at bars and cafés possible, one day, a young man, around twenty-five, came to me and introduced himself. It was David. Since then he has been my manager and an older brother as well. 

“Don’t. You. Dare!” He answers terrified and hurries to grab my phone. 

I jump on the couch, far away from his reach. “Then tell me.” I simply respond.

“Alright… Alright! It’s a boyband.” He says and I glance at him, angry. 

“Don’t tease me! Come on! Uhm… The Jonas Brothers?” I ask and he shakes his head.

“Uhm…” and suddenly I have forgotten every single boyband I have ever heard of. “Union J? I like that George guy. He’s cute.” David laughs at Chris’s reaction, since his smile fades once I mention George, but then speaks: “I can’t believe you still haven’t found them!”

“All-star Weekend? Seriously I don’t know.” I give up and then remember that I’m still standing on the couch so I just jump off and sit down.

“Drum-roll…” He says and then pretends to play the drums while making some weird noises. I roll my eyes. “It’s One Direction!”

“I can’t believe you didn’t find them. They’re like the biggest boyband right now!” Chris doesn’t hide his disappointment.

“Pay up young man!” David says and Chris pulls 10 dollars out of his pocket. I can’t believe that they had placed a bet about it, but then again, it'd be weird if they didn't. They always do.

“Oh my god.” I finally say. “I didn’t say ‘One Direction’ because they’re like super famous right now and there was no way they would ask someone like me to be the opening act for their tour.” I admit honestly. I’m still really surprised. Oh my God. One Direction.

“You don’t give yourself enough credit Ashley. You’re a great singer and hell of a songwriter and I’m saying this because it’s true and not because you’ve written ‘Impossible’ for me.” 

“Thank you, but still- We’re talking about One Direction! What did you say?” I turn to David.

“Nothing but I’m going to have dinner with their managers. Tomorrow night.” He explains putting the money in his pocket.

“Oh my God.” I finally breathe out.

\- - -

“I think my dress is too casual.” I say. 

“No, it’s perfect.” My stylist and make-up artist, Emma, replies.

I stare down at my white dress that has thousands of small black and hot pink triangles on it and then put on my black belt and my black sandals.

“Sit down.” She commands and then motions towards a chair, the hair-curler in her hand. I do so, too tired to respond since it’s only six in the morning. 

“Where’s my star?” I hear David shout all excited several minutes later, waking me up from the nap I was taking on the uncomfortable chair. Emma was still working magic on my hair and face.

I give a tired smile to David, that soon turns into a real big one, once he places a cup of coffee in front of me.

“I know you’re not a morning person.” He says and then sits on the couch behind us.

“Thank you!” I say and grab it in my hands. “So good!” I mumble sipping.

“What’s up? You look happy.” Emma asks while spraying something on my hair that smells fruity. I inhale deeply and then regret it immediately since I can’t stop coughing.

“Ash got herself the deal of the year last night.” He explains and I shrug once she glares at me and then quickly say: “Told you, I’m not a morning person.” She rolls her eyes and then turns back to my manager for more information.

“She’s touring this summer and guess with who? One Direction!” He continues. 

“That’s amazing! Congratulations Ashley!” She says sincerely, hugging me. 

I thank her and then turn to the chubby man behind me. “Tell her what else you did.” I add annoyed. He sighs and then shakes his head. “I told I’m sorry, alright?” He tries to apologize but Emma has already grabbed my face and starts applying a soft pink eye-shadow.

“You sound upset. What did he do?” She asks and I bite my lip, still trying to process everything that happened last night. 

“In order to actually open One Direction’s US tour, their managers thought it would be better if I was more popular than I am at the moment.” I start and she looks at me confused. “You’re already famous?” She points out but her statement comes out as a question. 

“Yes but I have only one album out and it came out almost two years ago. Anyway, they assumed that dating a member of the band will help me become more famous… and, a couple of weeks before the tour starts, me and Harry Styles, will go ‘public’. Actually, he’s picking me up after this show.” I say and then bite the inside of my bottom lip.

“What? You let that happen?” She shouts at David and throws her hands in the air, dissapointed. 

“She wouldn’t get to open their tour otherwise and we all know that this is the best thing that has ever happened to her career!” He replies and both Emma and I, don’t speak because we know that this is true. This is a huge opportunity for me.

“What about Chris though?” She turns to me again, now applying mascara on my eyelashes.

“I won’t let it affect us. We’ll keep dating but we won’t be able to go out in public in case someone sees us. Other than that, everything will be as before.”

“How did he take it?” 

“Well… I haven’t told him yet.” I say and close my eyes, ready to get yelled at. 

“Wow… Good luck with that.” is all Emma says before she finishes my make-up.

\- - -

It is very quiet in the room since no-one is saying anything after our previous intense conversation. 

“You have one minute.” A guy with headphones on and a mic across his face says as he enters the room we’re currently in and I just nod.

Emma hands me a lipstick to put on and I do so, before leaving the room. 

“Don’t forget to listen to what I’m saying to you through the headset! Alright?” David asks.

“I won’t mess up! I promise!” I smile and wait until the presenter of the show announces my name, so I can walk to the stage. 

The guy with the headphones, that had previously let me know that I had one minute left to get ready, is now standing next to me, waiting for the signal. 

“Please welcome Ashley Thompson!” I hear a woman shout enthusiastically and then the guy says to me: “Three, two, one, go!” 

I step onto the stage and start waving all around while the audience cheers for me and claps. I walk to the presenter, greet her and then sit on the couch opposite to her. 

For seven o’clock in the morning, she looks amazing. Her long brown hair is straight and up in a ponytail and she is wearing a simple red dress that ends just a little above her knees.

“Good morning Ashley! It’s so great to have you on the show! How are you?” 

“I’m great, thanks. I’m really happy to be here!” I smile, trying not to look tired, even though I’m exhausted.

“So, what are you doing right now? Are you on the studio, recording? Are you touring?” She asks and I take a deep breath trying to be as polite as possible since I’m not a big fan of reporters.

“I’m recording. My second album is almost finished. We’re currently taking care of the little details and stuff. I’m really excited and can’t wait for my fans to hear it.” I reply and the audience cheers again.

“That’s amazing! Can we know when it is coming out? Can we have a hint?” 

“I’m not allowed to say yet but I’m announcing the release date and the name of the first single of the record, next week.” 

“That’s great news. I assume we should be expecting it before the end of the year.”

“Yes, of course! I think the release is set for this summer. We haven’t decided on a specific date though.”

“Well, now… Are there any songs about your boyfriend Chris Russell on it?” Shit. I scratch my arm a little bit, since this is the signal I give David when I need his help.

“Answer: ‘We dated for two years, so there are a couple of songs about him on it.’ This way you’re making it clear that you have broken up.” I hear David speak into the headset I’m wearing. 

I do as he says and the next of the interview flies smoothly. I just answer some of the questions my fans have tweeted to the show’s page. 

Next, is my turn to perform and I decided to sing my latest single of my debut album ‘Giving Us Up’.

“Tell us a little bit about ‘Giving Us Up’. What is this song about?” The young woman asks.

“I wrote it a few years ago about my best friend. It’s about friendship and how sometimes even the friends you’ve had since you were a little kid, can't stay in your life forever. And no matter how hard you try, you need to let it go. Let them go.” I admit honestly and then go the end of the stage to perform. 

“Well, let’s hear it then.” 

The music starts playing and as I always do, I forget about everyone there and do what I love. Sing. 

 

I’m thinking of everything we had

of all the good memories and the bad

We said we’d be together forever

But now I believe that we should never say never

 

I’m finally giving up on us

I should have seen that it wouldn’t last

and I’ve said this many times before

but now, there’s nothing left to fight for

Please don’t say you’ll do anything

Don’t run behind me promising

"you’re going to make it up to me"

‘cause now it’s too late, you see

 

I never thought this day would come

never thought of what you could become

 

I’m finally giving up on us

I should have seen that it wouldn’t last

and I’ve said this many times before

but now, there’s nothing left to fight for

Please don’t say you’ll do anything

Don’t run behind me promising

"you’re going to make it up to me"

‘cause now it’s too late, you see

 

“That was amazing!” The presenter says clapping. “Thank you for being here today!” 

“No, thank you.” I reply, wave at the audience and head again backstage.

\- - -

“Wow, that was cl-” I begin but stop as I see Chris with David and Emma backstage.

He gets up from the couch, approaches me and says, his voice a whisper, breaking my heart into a million pieces. “When did we exactly break up?”

“Ashley, are you ready to go?” I hear someone behind me and turn around to see a tall, masculine boy with curly hair. Harry. He’s wearing black tight jeans, a simple white t-shirt and sunglasses.

I nod and then turn back to Chris. “I’m sorry, I’ll explain everything later. I have to go now because the fans and paparazzi are still outside- ” 

“Come on! We don’t have much time.” Harry says and grabs my hand to lead me out. I turn around just in time to see Chris fall on the couch and burry his face in his hands.

I sigh and look at Harry who just smiles at me. He intertwines his finger with mine, before we get out of the studio and rush towards his car. Many people are around us, screaming our names, taking photos of us and recording videos.

Harry leads me to his jeep, opens the door for me –of course- and then walks to the driver’s side and hops up. Before I say anything he leans towards and crashes his lips into mine. My first reaction, is to push him away from me, but I can’t do that since many people are watching us. So, I just close my eyes and kiss him back. When he pulls back, after a few seconds, he just laughs.

Putting his seat belt on, he says “Nice to meet you by the way.”


	2. Chapter 2

"I wish I could say the same." I admit honestly and Harry just sighs. I really want to explain that it's not his fault and that I have nothing against him, but I can't, not right now.

"I'm driving you to the studio now, am I right?" I nod, happy and relieved that he doesn't ask for an apology or an explanation about my previous response.

"Do you have the address?" I ask looking at him but he doesn't make any eye-contact with me. He's focused on the road. "I do." is all he replies.

The whole driveway is awkwardly quite. None of us is saying a word, Harry focused on the road and me, just staring out of the dark widow of his jeep. At some point I think of turning on the radio but this way I'm only going to make things more awkward.

"We're here." He informs me with a smile, when the car comes to a stop, after twenty minutes.

"You shouldn't have kissed me." I say, still looking out of the window.

"I'm sorry?"

I turn to face him. "Why did you kiss me? You were only supposed to pick me up from the studio."

"You kissed me back." He protests quietly.

"I didn't have a choice. I would blow everything up if I pushed you away." I close my eyes and take a deep breath. "Never mind." I sigh, opening the door. "Just don't forget that I have a boyfriend and that there's nothing going on between us." I continue, once I've hopped off the car.

I close the door behind me and start walking slowly towards the door of the recording studio, still trying to understand everything that has just happened.

"Ashley!" I hear Harry shout and I turn around surprised. The window is down and he's leaning towards it. "I really am sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you." He explains and a smile appears on my face. "Thank you." I mumble and he just nods. After a few seconds the black jeep has vanished.

\- - -

"Hello!" I greet Sam and he smiles politely at me. Sam is one of the song writers that help me with my album. He's quite thin and tall. His blonde hair is long and reaches his shoulders and his eyes are chocolate brown.

Before I even open my mouth to speak, David rushes in the studio, yelling on the phone. "No! That shouldn't have happened! No- I don't care! You should be able to control the boys! Listen to me! One more wrong move by him and this whole dating thing between him and Ashley is over!" He sighs, putting his phone in the back pocket of his jeans and then glares at me. No, this can't be good.

"Next time, when you rush out of the room like that, don't forget your bag. I'd like to be able to reach you. I can't do that when you don't have your phone with you." He explains and hands me my black bag. I simply nod, unable to say a word.

"Am I in trouble?" I hesitate. David lets out a laugh and I relax a bit knowing he's not angry at me.

"No. He is though. He wasn't supposed to kiss you Ashley." He replies and continues: "He was only supposed to drive you here so you can two be seen together. Then, based on how your fans and media reacted, we were going to see whether you two would turn out to be a couple or not. Harry messed up that part."

"Can we not only blame him? I kissed him back so it's my fault as well." I say, trying to protect him, feeling bad about what I told him earlier.

"That was so silly, irresponsible and immature of you. You confirmed via Twitter a couple of days ago that you were with Chris and you went and kissed Harry today. Not to mention that Chris was a mess after you left." At the mention of my boyfriend's name, my heart hurts. I should probably call him and try to explain everything to him.

Before I can pull my phone out of my bag, David lets me know: "He's on set. He probably won't answer. Plus, I think you shouldn't talk over the phone about this." He knows me so well, better than anyone in the world and he's right... again.

"We should probably get some work done." Sam says and I simply nod.

\- - -

We're finally taking a break after four hours of writing and singing. I lay on the couch feeling exhausted. Even though we've been here for such a long time we haven't finished any new songs yet since I can't concentrate on anything. All I can think is how much I hurt Chris and keep replaying mine and Harry's kiss in my head.

"Don't worry baby girl, everything will be alright." David smiles and places a bag on the table in front of me. He had gone to buy us lunch and now he is back.

"I hope so." I respond and grab a burger from the bag. I am not going to record today since none of the songs I tried to write were good enough so there isn't a problem in eating. I deserve this after such a day.

After eating, I attempt once more to write something good but sadly I come up with nothing good so instead I take a nap on the uncomfortable couch before I head to the mall to perform.

\- - -

Closing the door behind me, I search with my right hand the light switch so I can turn on the lights in my dark living room. When I finally find it, a scream almost escapes my lips since there's someone with their back turned to me, standing a few feet away.

"Chris." I mumble when my boyfriend turns around to face me. "Jesus, you scared the crap out of me! What are you doing here and with the lights off?" I ask dropping my bag on the armchair.

It's around midnight and I've just got home after the show at the mall. It wasn't a proper concert since I only sang five songs and there wasn't my band there but I got to meet a lot of my fans. I spent approximately two hours signing autographs, taking pictures and answering my fans' questions.

"I'm sorry I scared you. Well, I've just got here as well. Uhm, I - I think - we need to talk." He explains, helping me take my jacket off.

"I wanted to call you as well but it was midnight so I thought I'd do it tomorrow." I say but when he doesn't reply I add: "Can't we do this tomorrow?"

He takes my hand and leads me to the couch. We're now both sitting down looking at each other. Only now I notice that his eyes are red and puffy. He sighs closing them. "No. I think I deserve an explanation." He replies softly.

"Alright. I'm sorry, I'm just exhausted." I admit honestly, looking into his beautiful blue eyes. When I finish explaining the whole story to him he just smiles and hugs me. "I knew you would never do anything like this to me." He mumbles squeezing me and I let out a laugh.

"Sorry I'll let you rest now. I'll see you tomorrow." He adds but I stop him when I grab his hand. "Will you stay for the night? Please?" I question quietly.

"Isn't that a bit risky? What if they see me leaving your house tomorrow?" He asks leaning closer to me.

"I don't care." I respond with a smile and then bit my bottom lip.

"Alright then. I'll stay."

\- - -

I wake up to the sound of my phone ringing; I stretch my arm and grab it from the nightstand, my eyes still closed.

"Hello." I mumble and then manage to sit on the bed.

"Tell me that you didn't just wake up..." David says and I realise that Chris isn't lying next to me. He's gone.

"Alright... I won't. What's going on? Why are you calling?" I reply and get up to search for my boyfriend in the living room and kitchen. Even though I don't find him, I find a note with a red rose on the table.

"You're unbelievable! I called to ask you about- Just check your Twitter as soon as you can. I gotta go now." is all he answers before he hangs up.

I throw my phone on the couch and then take the rose from the table. I smell it, closing my eyes and then put it again on the table to take the note this time.

I didn't want to risk being seen leaving your house so I left early. This rose is for you. I love you Xx

I sigh and then move lazily to the kitchen to make myself some coffee.

Today is my day off after a really long period so my plans are to lay down on the couch and eat while watching movies. At night I'm going to Skype with my best friend since she lives in North Carolina and we can't meet in person.

I met my best friend, Taylor, when I was in primary school and since then we've been inseparable. She supported me and helped me through the darkest period of my life and I did as well. When I was sixteen though, when David found me at that karaoke party, I knew that if I really wanted to succeed, I had to move out and leave everything and everyone behind, even Taylor... and I did. Somehow though we still manage to be close and chat at least once per week.

With the warm cup in my hands I decide that my bed is a better option than my couch, so I head back to my bedroom. The room is painted beige and the wall facing my window is painted a light shade of brown. In the middle there is a huge double bed with lot of beige and olive pillows that is now all messed up due to the fact that I haven't made it yet. On my right, there is a drawer with a vase with flowers on it and some photo-frames with pictures of me and Chris, as well as my aunt Kathrine and my uncle Thomas.

Grabbing my laptop from the nightstand, I log in on Twitter, curious about what David said earlier. I struggle for a few minutes to find a comfortable position on my bed without being scared that I may spill my coffee.

"Wow." I mumble when I see that the number of my followers has increased over two millions overnight. I quickly type: "Wow! I reached 5 million followers! What can I say? THANK YOU SO MUCH! I LOVE YOU. #Speechless" I am following a few of my fans back when two of the trending topics catch my eye. One of them is "Ashis" and the other is "Ashley and Harry". Now I get why David wanted me to check my Twitter so bad and why One Direction's managers thought dating Harry would help my popularity.

I click on the "Mentions" button even though I am a bit scared of what I may see.

"@AshisIsPerfect: I can't believe you and Chris broke up! I hope you get back together soon!"

"@viclovesharry: Are you and Harry dating? You kinda look cute together."

"Maybe it won't be that bad." I think to myself.

"@ChrisRussellDE: I'm so happy Chris realised he could do so much better than you! You can't even sing to save your life."

"@harrysuniverse: I am a fan of you AND One Direction but I don't want you and Harry together."

"What was I saying?" I say out loud and then click on "Ashley and Harry". There are hundreds of pictures of me getting in his car and thousands of our kiss, as well as many articles saying that I'm his new girlfriend.

I sigh, wondering whether I should tweet anything about it or not. At the end I decide that it is better if I call David first and ask him.

"Wow." I say as soon as he answers.

"I know! You gained over two million followers on Twitter and got another million "Likes" on Facebook!" He says enthusiastically.

"I kinda feel like I don't deserve them though. All I did was kiss Harry. It wasn't because of my work or my music." I admit honestly.

"I guess you saw the trends? Well... Welcome to the industry." He trails off.

"Should I tweet that I am dating Harry? Confirm my break-up with Chris maybe?" I ask.

"What- no! I talked with their managers today. They apologised for Harry's behavior and we also agreed that it would be best if you and Harry don't see each other for a week or two and then take it from the start, slowly." I nod even though he can't see me.

"All you can tweet is that you're single but do it indirectly. Do an #AskAshley or something, you're clever, you'll figure something out. Talk to you later, I got to go now!" David hangs up before I have the time to say goodbye. I sigh and then do as he said.

After a couple of hours and after responding to many questions about my favourite things and my habits I say my goodbyes and turn off my laptop. Of course I avoided all those questions and tweets that were about Chris or Harry.

I search for my phone, believing that maybe a walk with a friend will do me good. I end up calling Emma and we agree to go on a shopping spree. My new single "Impossible" is coming out soon and since I'll have to perform at many shows, I have to buy new clothes.

Emma is my stylist and make-up artist, but also, a very good friend the past couple of years. She's only twenty-two years old so we hang out, out of work as well. Mostly we shop and visit spa's together but her sense of humor and easy going character makes everything we do fun.

Half an hour later, there's a knock on the door. Putting my sunglasses on and taking my bag from the hanger in my closet, I open to Emma. She's wearing a great high waist denim skirt with a white top and some brown sandals that match with her bag and belt. Her long blonde hair is up in a ponytail. As always, she looks amazing.

"Hello!" She greets me and kisses both my cheeks. Before I can reply she grabs my hand and we go outside. As soon as I hop on her car she asks: "Was he a good kisser?"

"Who?" I question even though I know who she's referring to.

"Harry!" She answers and I bit my lip. "You're blushing!"

"No, I am not!" I protest even though I can feel my cheeks radiate with embarrassment. "God, I have a boyfriend."

"You know I won't give up asking until you tell me." She declares, starting her car.

"I know." I pause and take a deep breath before I admit that "He was."

"There is going to be so much drama between you three!"

\- - -

My hands hurt from all the bags I'm carrying. "Can we take a rest please?" I beg Emma when we step out of H&M.

She glares at me. "No! Of course not! Keep going!" I draw a long breath and try to keep up with her walking when I see him, standing only a few feet away. He's wearing ablack t-shirt and black jeans. Victor. He's turned to the side so luckily he hasn't seen me.

"Shit!" I curse under my breath. I grab Emma's arm and push her back into H&M.

"What the hell?" She asks surprised.

"Remember that skirt I said I didn't like?" I ask her while practically running back to the shop.

"You actually said you hated it." She replies confused.

"Well... I changed my mind. I want it." I lie to her. "Hurry up! Someone might take it!"

"Alright! I'm coming!" She says trying to catch her breath. When we're back on the first floor of the shop I mumble: "Can you please go get the skirt for me? I need to make a call."

"Sure." She trails off probably more confused than before. When she's out of sight I grab my phone and call David.

"Victor's in L.A. I almost bumped into him." I say before he has time to even greet me.

"What - fuck! What is he doing here?" He asks sounding panicked.

"I have no idea." I admit biting the inside of my thumb.

"Here's the skirt." Emma politely taps my shoulder and I turn around to face her. I mouth "Thanks." while waiting for David to help me, only to realise that the other line's gone dead.


	3. Chapter 3

It has been a week since I went shopping with Emma and saw Victor. Luckily he hasn’t tried to find me or if he has he hasn’t managed to come in contact with me… yet. I know him well though and I’m sure he won’t give up so easily.

I shake my head and focus on getting ready since it’s the first day of rehearsals today. Walking into my closet, I pick some knee-length leggings and a loose white t-shirt with the logo of a band I’ve never heard of. I grab my dark brown hair in a ponytail and smile when I see in the mirror that it is a quite successful one which is pretty hard since I had cut my curly hair really short a few months ago. On my way out I also grab my sunglasses and a black cap since I’m going to need them; not so much about the sun as for the paparazzi.

Fortunately, no-one is outside my house so I get to my car quickly. After driving for almost half an hour I’m finally outside the studio. It takes me some time to find to which floor I should go but when I see David on the second floor, I sigh relieved. He’s on the phone but hangs up as soon as he sees me.

“Good morning! Ready for today?” He greets me with a hug.

“I drank two cups of coffee so definitely.” I say and he laughs.

“The boys will be here in any minute. Are you nervous?” He asks while we enter a huge dance studio.

“A little bit. I have only met Harry.” I admit, looking around. A huge banner catches my eye and I read aloud. “One Direction: Take Me Home Tour” Looking at David I question: “We’re not all going to rehearse here, are we?”

“No, we’re going to the dance studio on the fifth floor but first you have to record a few videos for your YouTube channel saying that you’re going on tour, the date the tickets go on sale, blah, blah, blah.”

Before I open my mouth to reply, I hear noise coming from outside. Taking my sunglasses and cap off, I throw them as well as my bag awkwardly on the corner of the room where David has left his. The door opens and five boys come in as well as a man around his fifties. He’s wearing a suit unlike David who’s just wearing some jeans and a simple t-shirt.

“Richard!” David greets him and shake his hand. When they start talking about the tour, I turn to greet the boys. They are all wearing sweatpants and simple t-shirt and look very tired.

“Hello.” I trail off awkwardly.

“It’s great to finally meet you, Ashley.” Liam says and pulls me in a tight hug. He catches me off guard with his gesture but I appreciate it since I feel already welcome.

“Thank you for inviting me, it’s an honour, really.” I mumble when he lets me go. Next is Niall, who hugs me as well. “We’ve heard so much about you.” He admits and I fight the urge to look at Harry.

I simply shake Louis and Zayn’s hands since our managers have called our names.

“Hello guys, I’m John and I’m going to give you a few tips on where you must stand, what you must say and what you should do during the videos.” He informs us and only now I notice that a whole crew has arrived and is now preparing their cameras, lights and everything else needed.

After he gave us all general advice he turned to me and Harry, explaining how through our gestures, looks and words we can look like we are a couple. Around twenty minutes later we are all standing in front of the camera, ready to record the video announcements for YouTube.

I’m sitting on a couch with Liam to my right and Louis to my left. Niall, Harry and Zayn are standing behind it.

“Hello! We’re very excited to announce our summer North America tour!” Liam says when the guy behind the camera gives him the signal.

“Tickets go on sale this Saturday, May 3rd on 10A.M. local time.” Niall adds with a smile.

“Also, we’re really happy to let you know that Ashley Thompson will be joining us!” Harry says. His hands are on my shoulders, rubbing them. I put my hand on top of his and then turn to look at him, smiling, exactly how I was told to do by John. He bites his bottom lip and then I turn at the camera. “For more information and updates follow us on Twitter and Facebook!” I finally say.

“We hope to see you all on the road!” Louis shouts & then we all cheer.

“Cut!” The director screams. “That was amazing guys! Harry and Ashley, I almost believed you!” I get up and walk to David’s direction.

“Good job, baby girl.” He mumbles, hugging me. “Thanks.” I simply respond.

“Your dancers are here, we should probably go.” He suggests and I make my way to the exit while he says his goodbyes to the crew and Richard.

“Ashley!” I hear Harry call and I turn around to face him. “Today was…”

“Awkward.” I interrupt him and he laughs.

“I was going to say interesting.” He smiles and an “oh” escapes my lips. “That’s why I wanted to talk to you. I noticed that you felt kind of uncomfortable today. We’re going to see each other a lot in the next few months and I don’t want every date to be like this.” I open my mouth to protest but he quickly corrects himself: “Every fake date.”

“That’s nice of you.” I smile, looking into his green eyes. “So… you’re suggesting that we could be friends?”

“Yes - no. Well, kind of.” He tries to explain but then someone calls his name and he has to walk off.

I decide to do something as well since I don’t like just standing awkwardly. Pulling out my phone I type on Twitter: “Got some great news for my North America Ashlies. Just stay tuned for more details! Only a few hours left for the announcement. I’m so excited : )”

“Ready to go?” David asks and I simply nod, putting my phone back in my bag. I look around for Harry and get disappointed when I see him still talking to his manager.

-

“Are you sure you remember exactly how to answer every question?” David asks, looking really nervous.

“Yes. I’ve memorized all the answers by heart. Don’t worry.” I ensure him, getting up.

It’s around eight o’clock and I’m at a live show after a really tiring day at rehearsals. At first the TV show presenter is going to interview me and then I’m finally performing my new song “Impossible” for the first time.

“Please welcome, Ashley Thompson!” Darren announces and I walk out. He’s standing just a few feet away and greets me with a kiss on the cheek. I wave at all the people that are there and then sit at the armchair he points.

“Hello Ashley! How are you?” He asks when the crowd stops cheering and clapping.

“Fantastic, thanks. What about you?” I reply honesty. Even though I’m a little tired, I’m thrilled to finally perform my first single.

“Great! It’s so good to finally meet you.” He admits and a huge smile appears on my face. Thanks.” I say.

“So, I’ve just watched the video in which you and One Direction announce you’re going on tour.” He explains and I look down, awkwardly smoothing my simple short black dress. “You know, everyone was talking about it and at first I was confused but then I searched it online and understood why.” He adds and motions towards the screen between us where a small clip of the video starts playing. It’s the one where Harry rubs my shoulders and we look at each other with so much love. It doesn’t look like we’re pretending or trying too hard and I smile proudly to myself. “So, you’re going on tour with them?”

“Yes! I got a call a week ago from their manager and got asked if I wanted to be the opening act for their tour and of course I accepted.” I say, and then turn back at the screen. The video’s paused at exactly the moment I look up at Harry. “Tell us a little about the tour.”

“Alight… We’re starting in June and we’re going to tour all around North America. There are going to be many shows but I’m very excited because I will be performing some of my new songs.”

Darren studies my face and then looking up at the screen asks: “So, you and Harry?”

“No!” I reply a bit too fast. “We’re just friends.” I respond just like David has ordered me since Harry and I won’t go public for at least another week.

“Oh, I see.” He sighs and then looks back at the screen where the picture of Harry kissing me in his car shows up. I bury my head in my hands and then look up again biting my lip.

“Do you kiss all your friends on the lips?” He questions sarcastically and the crowd laughs.

“Uhm… No.” I say, my cheeks turning red. Even though I know what he’s going to ask me and know exactly how I must answer I still can’t help but feel a little uncomfortable with all these people there staring at us. “It was just a kiss.” I add a few seconds later.

“Alright, alright but I bet that by the end of the tour you two will be together.” He smirks and I let out a small laugh.

“Well, you never know.” I say innocently and the crowd starts making noise. “What I wanted to say is you never know what’s going to happen. We may start dating, we may stay just friends or we may end up hating each other.” I explain and the crowd cheers once again.

“I must admit you look kinda cute together… and you’re both single right now, right?” He questions me, changing the topic to Chris.

“Yes, we are. I had forgotten how amazing being single felt.” I admit, trying not to look heartbroken while talking about Chris.

“What happened between you and Chris? You were dating for over two years and you looked so happy.”

“Well, I’m going on tour and Chris has to travel a lot this year to film his show and we have so complicated schedules we wouldn’t be seeing each other for over like four months so we decided to give it a break.” This is all true; after the tour starts we won’t see each other until October. We have though, sat down and agreed to try so we don’t lose what we’ve had for two years.

“I’m sorry to hear that.” He says, sadness in his voice.

“Don’t be. As I said you never know.” I remind him and then fake a smile.

“Alright! Let’s talk about the song you’re about to perform now. It’s called “Impossible”. Tell us a bit about it.”

“Well, I wrote it a few months ago and it is about how the little things like holding the door open for a girl or you know, giving her your jacket when she’s cold are the ones that make her fall in love.” I explain and he nods.

“Alright everyone! We will be back in a few minutes so don’t go anywhere. Stay tuned to hear for the first time ever Ashley Thompson performing her new song “Impossible”!

The cameras stop recording and a man comes and takes me backstage to change clothes. Emma rushes to get me out of this dress and hands me another. It’s red and has no sleeves. I put in on quickly and then sit down so she can fixes my make-up.

“You were amazing Ashley! Unbelievable!” David says enthusiastically when he walks in. “I think you would make a great actress. Let’s make sure you audition for a couple of shows.” He continues.

“Are you ready Miss Thompson?” The man that brought me backstage asks and I nod when Emma tells me I’m ready.

-

“Here to perform her new hit “Impossible” for the first time ever on television please welcome Ashley Thompson!” Darren shouts and the music starts playing.

 

You smile at me when you walk by

and I like how you’re so shy

You loved the way I cut my hair

and no matter what, you’re always fair

You hold the door open for me

and all these little things make me see…

-

From the moment you laid eyes on me

I somehow know what the end could be

I didn’t know if my feelings were right

but they were too strong to fight

Not falling in love with you

was something impossible to do

-

All these little things make me see

that not falling in love with you

was something impossible to do…

 

When the music stops the crowd starts clapping and shouting my name. I take a bow and then turn to Darren who’s now thanking me for appearing on his show. After all the typical goodbyes and after meeting a few fans and signing autographs for them, I’m on my way back to my house.

David is driving since I’m too tired to do so. I decide to check Twitter and see what is everyone thinking of my new song.

@WowAshlies: Impossible is my new favourite song! Can’t wait to listen to the studio version!

@AshTFans: I have Impossible on replay. I love it. I’m really excited for your new album.

I RT them and a few more and then type: “So happy everyone is loving #Impossible. Don’t forget to pre-order it on iTunes. Only ten days until its release!”

I smile proudly to myself and then close my eyes and lean against the door.

It’s a little after midnight and all I’m finally outside my apartment. All I want to do is go to sleep. To my surprise though the lights are on. “At least you turned them on this time and you’re not sitting in the dark.” I joke at my boyfriend, Chris, who’s looking out the window.

“Wave.” He says and I know that this is not Chris’s voice.

“Tyler?” I question shocked when the boy in front of me turns around.

“Ashley… Wake up, we’re here.” David pokes me and I open my eyes confused. I’m still in my car. It was just a dream.

“Are you alright?” He asks concerned.

“I had a dream. Tyler was in my apartment.” I explain rubbing my eyes.

“Tyler? Seems like Victor’s visit messed you up.” He takes a deep breath and I close my eyes.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, David. Goodnight.” I mumble exhausted and then hop off the car. I slowly make my way up the stairs and outside my apartment’s door. For some weird reason my heart starts beating fast. I inhale and try to calm down before opening the door. When I do so I’m relieved that no-one is inside. I don’t know why I was expecting to find someone in the first place. This is a high security building, it wouldn’t be easy for someone to sneak in so easily.

I decide to take a shower to calm down. After half an hour, I’m finally lying on my bed, ready to sleep when I hear a knock on the door. I curse under my breath while getting up. It’s probably Chris who’s lost his keys... again. I don’t bother changing into proper clothes so I head to the door just in my pajamas.

“Hi.” Harry greets me shyly.

“Harry? What are you doing here?” I ask confused.

“I got a message from David. He wants us to go to some kinda of party at a night club.” I close my eyes and take a deep breath.

“Come in.” I sigh. “You can sit in the living room while I get ready. It won’t take me long.” I explain and he nods feeling uncomfortable.

“Are you sure you want to go? You seem tired.” He points out.

“I am but we must go if David wants us to.” I say walking to my bedroom.

I open the doors to my walk-in closet and look around wondering what I should wear. Harry is wearing black tight jeans, a dark blue button up shirt and a black coat. I pick a dark blue dress as well so it seems like we have matched our outfits. It is really tight and has long sleeves. I match it with some accessories and then do my make-up and straighten my curly hair that are still wet from the shower. After almost half an hour, I’m ready.

“We can go now.” I say walking out of my room. Harry is sitting on the couch watching TV, he’s back turned to me.

“You look amazing.” He smiles when he stands up and looks at me.

“You don’t look bad yourself.” I respond and he takes my hand, leading me out of my apartment.

We get in his car and when he starts driving I pull out my phone to text David how much I hate him.

What have I done this time? He texts me back immediately.

You send Harry to take me to a club. Damn you David, I’m not in the mood to go clubbing after 8hrs of rehearsals.

I didn’t. Wait, are you with Harry?

Yes. He told me that you wanted us to go to this club together. I type but then erase the message and look up at Harry who’s smiling. At first I get ready to ask him about it but then I just don’t.

“Everything’s alright?” He asks.

“Yes.” I simply say and decide to not bring this topic up, all night. What has Harry on his mind?


	4. Chapter 4

“Do you want to dance?” Harry shouts so he can be heard over the very loud music when we enter the night club.

The place is packed with hundreds of people who are drinking and dancing to the song playing. The room is dark, only a few colorful lights, lighting it up.

“I don’t mind.” I simply say but then I just nod since I’m sure he hasn’t heard me.

“Let’s get something to drink first.” He mouths and then takes my hand in his, leading me to the bar. I blush because of his gentle gesture and I’m grateful that his back is turned to me so he can’t see my flushed cheeks.

By the time we get to the bar, I’ve been elbowed so many times from random young girls and boys who were too intoxicated to notice, I’m sure I’m going to be covered in bruises tomorrow. 

When the bartender sees Harry he smiles widely and then leans over the bar to greet him. I assume he’s one of Harry’s friends. His hair is short and brown and he has beautiful green eyes. He is wearing a light blue shirt and is very fit, his toned arms visible from the thin piece of fabric.

“Ashley, here’s Jack, a good friend of mine.” Harry introduces and I politely shake Jack’s hand.

“Nice to meet you.” He says and then kisses the back of my hand. I smile, trying my best to hide how uncomfortable I feel. Harry probably notices and fakes a cough.

“What can I bring you?” Jack asks, taking a step back. Harry answers him quickly, saying the name of cocktail I’ve never heard before.

“Make them two.” I add since I don’t know much about alcoholic drinks. Harry seems impressed, a smile appearing on his face.

Feeling my phone vibrating, I pull it out to see a text from David.

If you text me the address of the club, I’ll send over paparazzi so at least we get something out of this.

I roll my eyes and text my manager the address.

Putting my phone back in my purse, I turn my attention back to the two boys.

Jack asks Harry something I can’t hear, looking at my direction and Harry shakes his head quickly. Even though I don’t know what they’re talking about, I guess he probably questioned if we’re really together.

After a couple of minutes, Jack hands us both a tall glass with a light red liquid inside. Harry sips quickly and I do so as well. To my surprise, it tastes really great and kind of reminds of vodka and cherry.

Leaving my and his empty glasses, Harry places his hands on my waist and then leads me to the center of the large room, where everyone is dancing. As I move, I notice a couple of young girls taking pictures and recording videos of the two of us with their phones. I quickly wrap my arms around Harry’s neck. He seems confused so I whisper in his ear that there are people filming us.

His laugh surprises but when he place a peck kiss on my lips, I know he’s putting on a show. I look down feeling guilty for doing this to Chris and wondering if kissing someone else when you’re told to, counts as cheating. Remembering then the countless kisses he has shared with a few of his co-stars for the need of the TV series he’s staring at, I feel relieved but still not completely alright.

We dance and laugh like this for over half an hour and I can’t say that I’m not having a good time when a young girl interrupts us and is asking Harry for a photo. A take a few steps back so I’m not in it.

“Long time no see, right?” I hear a voice behind me and I freeze in my position. I know very well to who belongs this masculine voice and I blink a couple of times to assure that I’m not dreaming. I’m not. He’s here and he’s standing right behind me. Tyler.

At first I’m considering to pretend that I haven’t heard him and just walk away, that of course until I hear him again: “Don’t ignore me, Ashley. I came a long way to found you.” He emphasizes my name.

“Why are you here, Tyler?” I say harshly, turning to face him. He has changed so much since the last time I saw him. He’s even taller now, probably around 6’1 and even though he has lost much weight, he seems stronger. He has his head shaved now instead of having long brown hair like he did a few years back and his black eyes are glowing.

“Oi! Calm down princess,” He says smirking. “I don’t want to harm you or your fake-ass boyfriend and if you agree to help me out, I won’t have to.”

Fuck, how does he even know about me and Harry?

As if he is reading my thoughts, he pulls out of his pocket David’s phone. My jaw drops and I’m amazed by how he managed to steal my manager’s phone when we’re always surrounded by bodyguards.

“It was difficult but we’ve done worse together, remember?” He says. I look around searching for Harry but he’s nowhere to be found. Suddenly I feel helpless and terrified but I refuse to let Tyler see that.

“What do you want?” I say and I’m surprised that my voice didn’t crack.

“Money. What else?” He laughs. I want to give him the money so he disappears since it’s too risky to be seen with him but I know that if I do he’ll never stop bothering me and always come back asking for more.

When I see Harry, looking around, probably searching for me, I grab Tyler’s hand and walk to the back of the club.

“How much?” I ask as I open my purse.

“That’s my girl!” He says in excitement, clapping his hands. “Five thousand dollars.” He says simply and my jaw drops.

“I don’t have that much money right now.” I reply. Yes, totally helpless.

“Why don’t you borrow some from your boyfriend, who’s looking for you?” He smirks. “Should I call him over? He looks worried.”

Panic rushes over me. “Don’t you dare.”

“I can go home and bring you some, I can go right now.” I hate how this bastard manipulates me.

“I don’t have that much time to spare, princess.” He gives me an apologetic smile before shouting Harry’s name.

“I can give you my credit card.” I say, desperate.

Tyler starts laughing and when he stops he simply replies: “Have you seen many people pay for cocaine with a credit card?”

Oh. Even though I know he wants the money for drugs, it is weird to have him say it.

Looking at Harry’s direction, I’m glad to see that he’s still searching for me in the crowd which means he didn’t hear Tyler call his name.

When my phone vibrates and I see Harry’s ID on the screen, I say the words before I can stop myself. “I’ll give you ten thousands if Harry doesn’t see you.”

Tyler looks thoughtful for a few seconds and then nods his head with a smile. “You have an hour to bring me the money.”

“I’ll text David’s number.” I say relieved and then rush back to Harry.

When he sees me, he puts his phone back in his pocket and hurries to close the distance between us.

“Sorry, I was in the ladies’ room.” I lie and he just mouths “It’s alright.”

“Can we go? I’m not feeling really well.” I say a few minutes later after we’ve danced with each other for a bit. I feel awful for lying to him but I really have no other choice. If I don’t give Tyler the money on time, I know consequences will follow. I’m not scared that he will hurt someone I love. I am scared that he will ruin everything it have taken me years to achieve.

I’m disappointed though because I was starting to believe that I could leave the past behind. His appearance here proved exactly the opposite. No matter how far away I run, no matter how many times I change my name or appearance, I’ll never succeed. He, or someone else from my past will always find me. I shake my head not wanting to think about him and the darkest period of my life anymore.

“Sure. Are you alright?” He asks and he seems truly worried.

“Yes, I’m just tired, just like I said earlier.” I answer and it’s actually true. I’m exhausted.

“Alright then. I’ve already paid for our drinks and I think people have taken enough photos.” He informs me and I thank him.

When we walk out of the club, there are paparazzi everywhere and Harry quickly grabs my hand.

They’re taking pictures of us, the flashing lights blocking my vision and getting in front of us so they take better shots from better angles. They’re over thirty and they’ve surrounded us, screaming to us to look at them or answer their questions.

“Harry! Ashley! Are you dating?” One of them shouts.

“Are you making it official?” Another one says a few seconds after.

“Ashley! You got over Chris too fast, don’t you think?” A man says and then laughs and a few others join him.

Anger boils inside me and I try to stay calm. Harry probably hears him as well because he squeezes my hand in an attempt to relax me.

Luckily, we reach the car seconds later and quickly get inside. Harry opens the door for me and I thank him once again but I doubt he hears me since everyone around us is screaming. When he gets inside as well, he starts the engine and leaves everyone behind. If only it was that easy.

When I get home I rush to the safe I have in my bedroom and unlock it as fast as I can.

All the money I earn are saved in various bank accounts that only David has access to but I usually have a few thousands locked in this metal cuboid, just in case. When I grab ten thousands I put them in an envelope and then the envelope in one of my bags that's on the floor.

Looking at my phone I’m relieved to see that I have over twenty-five minutes and I’m not running out of time. The next thing I have to decide is where to meet Tyler. I can’t obviously tell him to come here or anywhere very close to the neighborhood. Of course though, he probably already knows my address since David had it saved on his phone. Damn.

After some thinking I decide to meet him at a small park. It’s not too far from here and no-one hangs out there anymore since it was trashed a few weeks ago.

Fortunately, when I arrive there after fifteen minutes, Tyler is completely alone.

I hand him the envelope. “Thanks, princess. I've always appreciated your generosity.”

“Take the money and just leave me alone. I don’t want to hear from you ever again.” I say harshly and then turn around and walk away.

I pull out my phone as soon as I get back in my car and call David’s house phone.

After three rings I get impatient and start tapping nervously my fingers on my thigh.

“Yeah?” I hear a sleepy David.

If I wasn’t so scared and nervous I’d probably laugh but not now. “I need you to find me a new house. Of course you have to move out as wel-”

“Wait, wait!” He shouts on his phone. “How much did you drink with Harry?”

“I’m not drunk,” I protest. “How do you know I was with Harry?” I ask confused since Tyler was the one to have his phone.

“I was the one who told you to go out. I called him before the show this afternoon. I wanted to tell you but you fell asleep right after.” He explains and then it all made sense. Tyler didn’t know about my date with Harry so that’s why he texted me that he hadn’t told him to pick me up. Then though, when he realized that he could probably make money out of this, he sent the text about the paparazzi. Why didn’t I figure something was wrong earlier?

“You still there?” David asks and I explain everything that happened tonight to him. I tell him about the phone, Tyler showing up at the club and even though I don’t want to, I tell him about the money as well.

“We’re screwed.” Is all he says when I finish talking.


	5. Chapter 5

After the incident with Tyler, David decided that it would be best if we both moved out of our places and go somewhere far away from where we previously lived.

So, here we are, a week later, at the “rich” side of the city, unpacking the few things I decided to take from my small apartment to this huge mansion, which is now my home.

I didn’t want a large house. I prefer small, cozy apartments that can make you feel comfortable. David though, insisted that this house, with its armored doors and complicated security system, was safer than any apartment or other house at my previous neighborhood could ever be.

As I enter the house, on my left, there is a huge living room and dining room, no doors or walls separating them. The walls are painted beige and very light green. The couches are beige and have pillows on them in various shades of brown. On the left corner there is a fireplace and in the center, on the wall, a huge television.

The dining set is made by a very dark brown wood and I love how it matches the pillows in the living room.

On my right, there’s a door that leads me to a huge modern kitchen, with white counters and a bar. What’s really beautiful about this room though is that there are huge windows on the opposite wall and through them you can see a huge garden with various colorful flowers. I don’t really like gardens because that also means bugs but I love mine and how it makes the whole house smell like roses.

On the first floor, there’s also a recording studio which I’m really excited for. I have to learn how to use all of those machines first though. In this room, there’s a piano and a few guitars as well.

This house cost over a couple of millions since it came fully furnished. When David first told me that he spent that amount of money on the house, that I’m not going to use a lot anyway since half of the year I tour, I almost hit him in the head with my guitar.

Before getting signed, my family barely made enough money to buy clothes and food and in winter we had no heat. That’s why I hate spending lots of money on things that aren’t necessary.

There are two more rooms on the first floor and those are a huge bathroom and what looks like an office.

On the second floor now, there are three very large bedrooms, another office -smaller than the one downstairs- and two more bathrooms. What I’m also really excited to use is my new hydromassage bathtub. The only thing I’m not going to miss about my old place is its narrow shower.

“Ashley, get up, there are over ten more boxes in the living room. You need to unpack.” David says while leaving on the floor another box that has written bedroom on it with huge black letters.

“Give me a second.” I reply and take a moment to enjoy the comfort of my new huge double bed.

“No, we have to finish unpacking and then go to rehearsals. Also, you have a dinner with Harry tonight.”

“I hate you.” I say, burying my face in my pillow.

“No, you don’t. Now get up.” He simply responds and then leaves the room to go outside to get the last few boxes.

I sigh and then force myself to get up and off the bed. I take in my hands the last box David brought and then open it with a pair of scissors.

There are photo albums inside and a few photo frames with pictures of me and my best friend, me and David and of course Chris.

Even though I saw Chris last night, I miss him very much lately. I hate how we can’t go out with each other anymore, how we can’t even be seen together and I know how it breaks his heart to see everywhere he goes pictures of me and Harry together or constantly getting asked about our “break-up”. Sometimes, I want to scream: “Fuck this! I’ll be with whoever I want!” but I know it’s not that simple.

I laugh at the irony of my dinner tonight with Harry when I was having dinner with Chris yesterday.

When I am done unpacking, after a couple of hours, I take a quick shower wishing I had time to use my new bathtub.

What also David insisted on changing after Tyler’s visit, is my car, which doesn’t even let me drive anyway, because I have a chauffeur now. So, when I am all dressed-up, I head outside.

The car is waiting, a man standing on the side of the black door, waiting so he can open it for me.

Getting closer, I realize that the man standing, is very young, probably in his late twenties or early thirties. He has olive skin and dark short hair. His eyes are a very beautiful green color. He’s much taller than me, probably around 6’1 and he looks fit.

“Hello, Miss Thompson,” He greets me, sticking his hand out for me to shake. I do so, smiling politely. “I’m Dylan and from now on, I’ll be your driver.” He continues and I reply that it’s a pleasure to meet him.

\- - -

“I’m not wearing this.” I say stubbornly once Emma places in front of me the dress she wants me to wear to my date with Harry in a couple hours. It’s very simple, its dark red color though and deep V neck, making it too… revealing.

Harry is taking me out for dinner at a very expensive restaurant, where of course will be many paparazzi since we finally have gone public this morning.

While I was at my new home and unpacking, thinking about how I hate breaking Chris's heart, Harry was at a radio show, confessing his love for me.

“Yes, you are.” She smiles, not even looking at me, as she picks out my jewelries and going through my make-up products.

It’s not that I don’t like the dress but I want to wear it for someone like Chris, not Harry.

I take a long breath and exhale sharply to let her now that I’m not very pleased but she just laughs.

After over an hour and a half, I’m finally ready. Emma didn’t let me look in the mirror after wearing the dress since she wanted to finish with my make-up and hair first.

“You’re ready!” She smiles proudly and then claps her hands. I get up from the chair I’ve been sitting the last hour and move to my large wall mirror.

Wow. That’s my first reaction to the girl in front of me.

My hair is down and styled in loose curls. My make-up is simple except the red lipstick on my lips. The dress compliments my curves perfectly and the black high heels I’m wearing, make my legs seem somehow longer and thinner.

“Now, get your purse and coat and go outside.” Emma pushes me out of the door when she hears the doorbell and Dylan, letting us know that my “date” is here.

Harry is waiting outside his car for me and his jaw drops when he sees me. He’s wearing a light blue shirt with white hearts on it and dark tight jeans.

“You look incredible.” He mumbles and then bites his lip.

“Thanks.” I reply, while he opens the door of his car for me. 

This is going to be a very long night. 

The restaurant isn't too far from my new house, only a few minutes’ drive. Harry doesn't say a word while he is driving and neither do I. He seems nervous though and I promise myself to not be hard on him and even give the whole friendship thing a try.

When we arrive at the restaurant, my jaw drops. There are plenty of expensive, fancy cars outside. The whole place around is covered in greenery and there's also low flowers all around the small fountain close to the front door of the restaurant.

I can't help but think that if Harry really knew me at all, if he really ever took me out on a date, he would never take me to such a place.

A middle age man, who's wearing a black suit and a bow tie, greets us at the door and after he asks if we've made a reservation, he leads us to a table that's exactly in the center of the room. I roll my eyes, annoyed. Of course it's in the center. We want everyone to see us.

"Do you like this place?" Harry asks when we get comfortable.

"No," I reply as I pick up the menu and open it.

"Oh," He seems surprised and confused. "Why? It's nice." He says and I take a deep breath, thinking about the promise I've made about giving it a try.

"It's just... I don't like such expensive places. I prefer simpler things. Especially on dates." I try to explain, not ready to confess to him my family's story and how we were really poor.

"I'll have that in mind, next time." He smiles and I look down, blushing.

"What are you ordering?" I ask, a few seconds later. "I don't even understand what all these gourmet dishes include." I admit, honestly and Harry laughs.

"That makes two of us." He replies and I laugh as well, joining him.

"Let's just order the dish of the day. That's what I did the last time."

"Have you been here many times?"

"No, just a couple."

"More fake dates?"

"No, they were real ones." He smiles, leaving the menu on the table.

"Do you have a girlfriend?" I ask, before I can stop myself.

Harry seems confused at first and then sadness takes over. I immediately regret asking.

"Not anymore." He responds and tries to smiles but he fails miserably.

"I'm sorry." I tell him, honestly.

"Don't be. It's been a long time since then." He replies and I'm grateful when the waitress comes and asks us to order.

Harry orders for both of us the dish of the day and some kind of red wine.

"Tell me about you." Harry says when he turns to face me after the young waitress goes back to the kitchen.

“What do you want to know?” I smile, drinking some of the red wine they instantly bring us. It tastes really good.

“Anything, really. You can go on all night.” He mumbles, his eyes on me.

“Uhm, alright. My name is Ashley Anne Thompson. I’m nineteen-” I start but he interrupts me by laughing.

“What?” I ask shyly, confused.

“I know all these things already. Tell me about the small things. Like, for example,” He pauses to find an example and I think to myself that I love how he makes a lot of gestures with his hands while talking. It’s cute.

Stop. You have a boyfriend.

“For example, if you sing in the shower, if you wear socks while sleeping.” He adds and seems proud of himself.

“Alright, I got it this time.” I laugh. “I…”

“Come on! Whatever pops up on your mind first!” He encourages me.

“Oh! I know! When I was young, I used to take ballet lessons. It was awful. I couldn’t dance to save my life. I was just so… awkward.” I admit, remembering myself as a five-years-old girl, dancing while wearing a pink skirt.

“Your turn?” I suggest and he seems surprised once again.

He sips some of his wine before talking. “I hate 3D movies.” He confesses, after he lets down his glass.

“Why?” I ask, interested.

“Because of the glasses. They’re hideous and I feel self-conscious wearing them.”

“You shouldn’t. You could wear a trash bag and still like better than every other boy I’ve ever met.” I reply.

“Thanks.” He smiles and my cheeks are turning red. Why can't I keep my mouth shut around him?

“Next.” He says after a few seconds.

“Alright. When I was young, again, I used to think that the word virgin meant someone who isn’t married-“

“No, you didn’t! Oh my God.” He says, covering his face.

“Wait, it get worse!” I try to hold my laughter. “So… I was wandering around, proudly telling everyone that I wanted to stay a virgin forever.” Harry throws his head back, laughing really hard. Everyone at the restaurant is staring at him.

“I was 6-years-old!” I protest but at the sight of Harry holding his stomach while laughing, I do the same.

The night goes by quickly and I can honestly admit that I’m actually having so much fun.

Harry is the kind of person you can easily joke with but can have a serious conversation as well. He’s easy-going, very funny and never makes you feel uncomfortable.

When Harry asks for the paycheck, I excuse myself and go to the bathroom to refresh my make-up and fix my hair.

The bathroom, just like the rest of the restaurant, is very clean and luxurious. I apply again red lipstick and then run my fingers through my hair, carefully so I don’t ruin the loose curls.

When I get out, there’s a man standing next to the door, leaning against the wall.

“Good job tonight.” He says, a smirk on his face.

“Excuse me?” I trail off. The man looks familiar but I don’t recognize him.

“The date with Harry. You were convincing.” He speaks, coming closer to me.

I take a few steps back, trying to increase the distance between the two of us.

Who is this man? What does he know about me and Harry?

“I’m Richard. One of One Direction’s managers.”

I take a deep breath, relieved. “Oh, yeah. Can I help you?” I ask, remembering seeing him a few times, in rehearsals.

“Just keep up the good work. Harry’s career, One Direction’s reputation and how well the tour goes, depends on you. I hate to say it but their money depends on you. My money depends on you.”

“I won’t mess up.”

“I’m not worried about you. You’re a clever girl and like I said before, a good actress. I’m worried about Tyler and Victor. I’m worried that someday, someone will find out who Wave is, that they will dig up your past.”

My breaths quicken and I feel dizzy. He knows. Did David tell him? No, he wouldn’t, that could ruin my career.

“You don’t have to worry about them though. Leave that on me. I can handle two boys. You just make sure nobody else learns about them. Make sure everyone believes your lie while I try to destroy any evidence of what you've done in the past.”

I nod and then he lets me go back to my table.

“Are you alright? You’re pale.” Harry asks.

“I’m alright.” I lie and lean in to give him a peck kiss.


	6. Chapter 6

I wake up to the doorbell ringing.

I stretch my hand and grab my phone from the nightstand that’s next to my bed.

8:00 A.M.

Great, I can’t even sleep until noon on my day off.

It’s been a couple of weeks since my dinner with Harry and my chat with Richard. Two really busy weeks of doing photo-shoots for the tour's posters and merchandise and of recording the videos that are going to be played while I perform. Let’s don’t forget, searching for the right yet comfortable clothes that I’ll be wearing on stage and of course all the singing and dancing in rehearsals.

Even though I’m exhausted since I’ve been working non-stop all day these past two weeks, I’m also very excited. Well, I’ve been on tour before but it was only on small venues not arenas that fit thousands of people. I can admit I’m really nervous, we start in only two days. The fact that everything is set, though -from the set-list to the way my hair and make-up will be- calms me down a little bit.

Jumping off my bed I get out of my bedroom to answer the door, only to remember that I’m not in my small apartment anymore but this huge mansion.

To my surprise, I see Dylan and a middle age man when I open the door. The man is carrying a huge brown paper box and from his outfit I understand that he’s probably working for some kind of Delivery Company.

When Dylan sees me, his eyes wander from my outfit –which is a pair of Winnie the Pooh PJs- to my really messy hair and then he looks me in the eyes, an amused smile on his face.

“You shouldn’t have come down. I’m taking care of this.” He tells me.

“I’m sorry. I’m just not used to-” I look at the house and him. “...all of this.” I admit, honestly, trying my best to avoid his gaze.

I sign quickly on all the needed papers and pay the man who hands me the big box.

I don’t waste any time, I shut the door and head inside, before Dylan can speak. It’s rude of me but I’m wearing Winnie the Pooh PJs for God’s sake.

I sigh and then turn my attention to the box. Usually, various clothes designers and make-up companies send me their new products so I can try them and maybe promote them. This though, doesn’t look like one of them since it hasn’t a logo on the outside and it’s kind of larger than the usual boxes.

Inside there are a few smaller boxes -that do have logos on- and an envelope that catches my attention. It’s white, really simple and the only thing on it it’s my name, messily written.

I open it carefully and pull out the letter that’s inside.

Good job so far. Keep it up and soon enough you could be the most successful female singer of your generation. Here’s a small reward to keep you motivated. – Richard

I read and then check again the small envelope to see another piece of paper inside. It’s a check. A check of $100,000.

My jaw drops. It seems like Richard desperately wants everyone to believe that I am in a relationship with Harry. Of course. He’s getting paid from the money One Direction make.

This, makes me realize how different David is and how he would never put money before me. He’s like family to me.

Leaving the papers on the floor next to me, I take out all the other boxes. All of them are from very expensive brands and from some of the best designers in the US. “Emma will freak out.” I think to myself and then dial her number.

 

If I hate one thing, that’s meetings with my co-workers.

They all expect me to make all the important decisions and motive them but I can’t do any of these. Instead, I sit there awkwardly while David talks to them.

Today, it’s our last meeting before the tour begins and we’ve gathered to discuss about my album and the music video for my new single “Impossible”.

“Hello,” I greet everyone when I enter the room with my manager.

My band, the choreographer we hired for the tour, my back-up singers -Rachel and Emily- as well as Emma and a few people from my record company are sitting around the table and greet me too.

David introduces me to a man I’ve never seen before, who, he says, is responsible for my new music video.

The first topic we’re discussing is the tour. We’re not discussing as much as checking if everything is set. Luckily, there aren’t any problems. I have some new, last minute ideas though that everyone listens to, carefully.

After a couple of hours, we have finished and everything’s been taken care of.

Everyone agreed with my idea of covering a different song on each show as long as it suits the rest of the set-list and isn’t offensive. My band got really excited and found my idea refreshing. Also, we all decided to push back the release date of my album since this tour will give me many ideas to work with. Last, we talked about the “Impossible” music video. We found what it is going to be like and also set a date for its filming.

Luckily, I haven’t planned anything for the rest of the day so I head home and order Mexican for lunch. When I finally get home, I’m starving so I eat quickly while catching up with the TV series Chris is staring at, “Torn”.

To my disappointment, the last episode of its current season ends with a cliffhanger and I make a mental note to myself, to ask my boyfriend about it.

Jensen, the role he’s portraying, is so different from him and for me, to see him –this kind and loving person- play such a mean and rude boy, makes me realize what an amazing actor he is.

Turning on my laptop, I decide to Skype with my best friend, Taylor, since we haven’t in a while. Seeing she isn’t online, I send her a message and decide to log in on Twitter as I wait. I’m terrified though, that my mentions will be filled with death threats and hate tweets.

My timeline is full of pictures of me and Harry from our visit to a movie premiere yesterday and a few older ones from our trip to the mall a week ago. They are all of us laughing and looking at each other with love.

I wonder if I should tweet anything about last night but by promoting my relationship all the time, it will be kind of obvious that we’re dating for publicity. Instead, I type: “I’ve got a little surprise for everyone who’s coming to see me and One Direction on tour!”, referring to the different covers I’m doing on each show.

I’m RTing and following my fans when Taylor finally logs in.

“Hey,” She greets me when she appears on the screen.

Her long dark hair is styled in a messy ponytail and even though most of the time she’s wearing contract lenses, she’s wearing her glasses right now.

“Hey! How are you?” I smile, happy to talk to her.

“I’m great. Everything’s alright,” She says. “Your family is great as well. I was at your place this morning. They miss you.” She continues, trying to adjust her web-camera and microphone, causing me to cringe due to the loud noises coming from my headphones.

“I miss them too,” I sigh. I haven’t been to my hometown, North Carolina, in months.

“So…What have you been up to? How’s Chris?”

“Well… I’ve been working a lot lately and I’m exhausted.” I sigh. “We’re leaving for Canada tomorrow morning to prepare for the first show that’s in two days.” I continue.

“Good luck! You’ll do great.”

“Thank you! I’m so nervous. I think that I will mess up.” I confess, biting my nails.

“You won’t. You’re freaking Ashley Anne Thompson.” She laughs and I do too.

“Thanks! As for Chris, he’s alright. He’s going to Europe with the rest of the “Torn” cast next week.” I inform her.

Truth is, I miss my boyfriend terribly since we rarely see each other anymore. Even though we promised that we would try to make our relationship work out I’m not so sure anymore. We will be thousands miles away from each other for over three months.

“You’re still together?” She asks, disappointment in her voice.

“Yes?” I hesitate.

“Ash,”

“What? Did you expect me to break up with him?” I question her, slightly annoyed.

“No, I just- You know…” She trails off, looking away from her computer screen.

“You think that I will fall in love with Harry?” I laugh.

Harry is a great guy. He’s funny and very kind but I could never imagine myself with anyone other than Chris.

“I do, actually. I know you too well. You fall in love so easily.” She replies and deep inside I know she’s right.

“I won’t.” I say stubbornly.

“Do you need me to remind you that you’ve written a freaking break-up song when you were fifteen, just because your crush slash neighbor, didn’t greet you when you saw him one day?”

“I-”

“Your song. Separate Ways.” She continues.

“That’s different.” I say. She’s right by the way. I have written a break-up song about that boy. To my defense, I had had a crush on him for over three years.

“Right.” She makes fun of me, rolling her eyes. “When you start writing songs about Harry though, you’ll remember my words.” She smirks.

“I won’t.” I remind her.

“I must go now. My mum wants me to wash the dishes.” She tells me, annoyed and tired of her strict mother.

“I will see you in a couple of weeks at the show in North Carolina.” I say before closing the Skype window on my screen.

Turning off my computer, I decide to start packing.

I only take a few of my favourite outfits since I’ll be going shopping on tour anyway. I also pack my new make-up products and put in my suitcase a few books as well. I love reading when travelling.

My phone rings, letting me know I have a new text message from Emily, one of my back-up singers.

Rachel asks if you’re bringing your guitar with you or if she should bring hers. We’re packing together!

The text reads and I reply quickly that I’m bringing mine since I don’t have much luggage anyway.

I’m so happy to have Emma, Emily and Rachel on tour since the rest of the crew -my band, One Direction and One Direction’s band- are all boys. Also, the fact that my make-up artist/stylist and back-up singers are great friends of mine makes it even better.

My phone rings again but this time it’s from Chris who’s inviting me to his place. Putting on some skinny jeans and a simple t-shirt with Pink Floyd’s logo on it, I answer him that I’m on my way.

Of course I’m not allowed to drive so Dylan is taking me. This will take me some time to get used to. While we’re on our way, I catch myself wondering if Dylan has a girlfriend or a house because he always seems to be around.

Before I get out of the car, I check if there are any paparazzi or fans around that could take photos of me entering Chris’s house. There’s no-one in sight.

I hate the fact that we have to meet each other secretly now. It’s depressing and it feels wrong.

Chris’s house is quite big; smaller than mine, but still too big considering the fact that only him and his dog live there.

I wave goodbye to Dylan and head inside. Chris’s dog, Kyle, is out in the garden, chasing a butterfly. When he sees me, he runs towards me. I pet him on the head and then he accompanies me to the door.

Chris opens the door for me and leans in to kiss me but I stop him immediately since we don’t know who may be watching us. Instead, I walk inside and crash my lips to his as soon as the door’s closed behind us. When we pull away, he’s smiling. It fades quickly though.

“I need to talk to you.” He tells me in a serious tone and my heart aches. This can’t be good.

He takes my hand and we both sit on the couch in his cozy living room.

“Torn isn’t going very well lately. We keep getting less and less views this month.” He says and I feel relieved. I’m really sad to hear that the TV series he’s staring at don’t do well, but I’m also happy that his news don’t affect our relationship… Or do they?

“You have a contract for another season.” I point out.

“Yes,” He seems thoughtful. “What I wanted to tell you, is that the producers of the series talked to my manager and they want me to do something that could make me be all over the news and magazines. It’d be great advertising for the series.” He explains.

“Something like what?” I ask, suspicious.

“Date Caroline.”

“No way,” I say and get up from the couch. “You’re not dating that slut!” I shout referring to his co-star.

With ginger long hair, green eyes and a body that could easily be a model’s, Caroline is the person I despise the most.

I’m not jealous and I trust Chris but they used to date in the past for several months. Also, she’s so talentless, I’m sure she slept with all the producers to get her part in the series. Having her being near Chris makes me sick.

“You’re dating Harry.” Chris points out and I know he’s getting angry.

“It’s different with him.” I protest and realize that this isn’t the first time I say this today.

“How can it be any different?” He questions, getting up from the couch and coming closer to me.

“I was never in a relationship with Harry,” I simply say and repeat: “You’re not dating Caroline.”

“I don’t have a damn choice Ashley!” He shouts and then closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. “You know what it’s like in this industry!” I sigh. Great. Now we’re fighting over Caroline.

“Do you know what it is like for me to see pictures of you and Harry everywhere go? To have everyone ask me how I feel now that my girlfriend is dating a member of the most popular boy band in the world?” I can hardly hear him, his voice is a whisper.

“Chris, I’m so-”

“Don’t you dare tell me you’re sorry! When they told you about dating Harry, you didn’t even bother telling me first!”

“I was going to!” I yell at him. He knows that I would never purposely hurt him.

“When? After he fucked you?” He’s really angry at this point and from his sayings I know he’s not himself. “I had to find out the cruelest way by having you say it on TV!”

I can feel the tears coming and all I want to do is storm out of the house. I want to forget about all of this.

“Call me when you’ve stop acting like a fucking twelve-years-old child!” I shout and grab my stuff.

I run out the door, finally letting my tears fall. He calls my name several times but doesn’t follow me. He doesn’t try to stop me.

No matter how I angry and hurt I am, it still hurts.

 

It’s been over half an hour since my fight with Chris and I’m trying to find my way back to my house. It’s cold outside and it’s also starting to get dark. I would call Dylan to come pick me up… if my battery hadn’t died.

The road is empty and I’m terrified that something’s bad about to happen. When a black jeep appears, I pray to God to not get murdered or raped.

“Ashley!” I hear somebody call my name.

Harry.

When I turn around, Harry has already jumped off the car and is by my side.

“Are you alright?” He asks and only when I try to speak, I realize that I’m still crying.

“Everything is going to be alright.” He says softly and wraps his arms around me. I hug him back and bury my face into the curve of his neck while trying to calm myself down.

“Come on, I’ll take you home?” He hesitates and I nod, grateful to have him find me.

The drive is silent and even though I know that Harry wants to ask me what’s wrong I know that he doesn’t want to appear rude.

“I got in a fight with Chris.” I tell him and whip my eyes.

Harry stays quite for a few more seconds. “Did I cause that fight?” He asks, not showing any emotions.

“No,” I lie and he just nods.

 

“Thank you.” I say when he pulls over my house.

“You’re welcome. Hope you two work through this.” He replies smiling.

I nod, biting my lip. “Do you want to come inside? I don’t want to be alone right now.” I confess while looking down.

When I look up at him, he seems surprised and confused. “I don’t want to cause any more trouble.”

“You won’t.” I ensure him. What am I even doing telling him to come in?

“Aright. Give me a second to park the car.” He answers and I smile.

To my surprise, when I walk inside the lights in the living room are on.

“David?” I call. He’s probably here to check on me.

Instead, Chris appears from the kitchen. “I didn’t want us to be in bad terms while you’re on tour so I came here to apologise.” He speaks softly and comes closer to me.

“Chris, I-” I try to speak but I’m interrupted.

“Everything’s alright. What should we do now?” Harry asks while walking in the house. I can almost hear the sound of Chris’s heart breaking.


	7. Chapter 7

“I think I should go.” Harry mumbles when he sees my boyfriend standing in the middle of my living room.

“Damn right, you should.” Chris says sharply and I’m thankful that Harry doesn’t reply and just walks out.

“It hasn’t even been a fucking hour and you’re already with him! Are you serious?” He shouts when Harry shuts the door behind him.

“He just brought me home.” I try to explain.

“Do you ask everyone who brings you home to come inside?” He asks sarcastically.

“What is wrong with you? How dare you say that? You know me! We’ve been together for years! You know I’m not that kind of girl! Why are you letting this get between us?” I raise my voice. I’m so angry at him. Yes, it probably was wrong to invite Harry here but Chris has no right to say things like that.

“You’re the one who doesn’t want me to date Caroline; yet, you’re planning to spend the night with Harry!”

“What are you talking about? I wasn’t going to spend the night with Harry!” We’re fighting again and sadly, getting nowhere.

“Did you came here to fight?” I say calmly. Chris run his fingers through his hair and sighs.

“I was a mess. Dammit!” He replies and comes closer to me. “I spent an hour thinking of our fight.” He takes my hands in his and then looks deeply into my eyes. “I wanted to come here and apologize for the hurtful things I said earlier but I found you with Harry, Ash.” He lets go of my hands and then turns his back to me.

“What do you want me to do? What do I have to say to make you believe I have no feelings for Harry?” I say desperately and he thinks about it for a few seconds.

“Don’t go on tour with them.” He simply says like he’s announcing what we’re having for dinner.

I laugh, he’s joking. He can’t be serious. When he doesn’t speak again I look at him with tears in my eyes. “You know I can’t do that.”

“You have to choose. It’s me or the tour.” He’s quite and doesn’t look angry even though I know he’s furious.

“You can’t make me choose.”

“Watch me.” He says with his hands up in an innocent gesture.

The next words somehow find their way to my trembling lips. “You need to go.”

Chris shakes his head. “So it’s him? You choose him?”

“Oh my God, Chris! Get over yourself! I barely know the damn guy!”

“Yet, you bring him home.” He snaps.

I sigh, tired of fighting with him. The young man that’s in front of me now, is nothing like the guy I met and fell in love two years ago. He’s nothing like my kind and sweet boyfriend. Who would have thought that Chris could be the jealous type?

“Go.” I repeat, avoiding his eyes.

Chris chuckles nervously. He bites the inside of his lip before grabbing his coat from the couch, leaving me alone and crying in this huge empty house.

Leaning against the wall, I slowly sink to my knees. I sit on the floor for a while, thinking of everything that just happened.

When realization hits me, I stand up, scream and throw everything that’s around me against the wall or break it in any way possible. I have no control over my body that’s shaking due to my sobs. Looking around me, I search for more things to throw and destroy. I grab the pillows off the couch and kick them, causing them to land at the bottom of the stairs. Walking to the bookcase, I take each one of the books and rip all of the pages while shouting and crying.

Suddenly, I feel two arms wrap around me, trying to stop me.

“Ashley! Ashley! Stop!” I hear David shout. I stop trying to fight him, stop trying to break out of his grip. He’s holding me too tight to move anyway. I can’t do anything, so I just cry some more.

Opening my eyes, I look around at my messy house. On the floor there are ripped pages and tiny pieces of broken glass. Glass, that I don’t even remember breaking.

No. No, no, no. I did it again after all those years.

“Show me your wrists!” David says loudly and I obey by taking off my jacket.

David doesn’t speak and I’m too scared to look down at my hands. He just hugs me and tries to conform me by whispering in my ear that everything’s going to be alright.

“No, it’s not.” I manage to say between my sobs and David just inhales deeply.

 

“So, what happened?” He asks me after I’m all calm and sitting on the couch. My eyes and throat still hurt though. He hands me a glass of cold water and then sits on the opposite couch.

“I just lost it.” I admit after I’ve drunk all the water.

“For no reason?” He asks, trying to understand.

“I got in a fight with Chris.” I inform him and then pull out my phone from my pocket to check for any missed calls or text messages. Nothing.

“Did you two break up?” He questions, picking up a pillow from the floor and putting it back on the couch.

“No.” I quickly answer. We didn’t break up… did we?

He told me that I chose Harry over him and I yelled at him to go… but all couples fight every now and then.

“When? After he fucked you?” Chris’ words echo in my ears and I squeeze my eyes shut to stop new tears from falling down my cheeks.

“Maybe we did. I don’t know.” I mumble, biting the inside of my thumb.

“Why did you fight anyway?”

“Did you know that they wanted him to date Caroline?” I question, angry.

“Yes, he told me this morning.” He replies quietly. “Don’t be too hard on him. He has plenty on his plate right now.” He defends him and I look at him in disbelief.

“He made me choose David. He made me choose between him and the tour! He knows I love him but he also knows that I love what I’m doing.” I keep my voice low.

“He’s going through a lot. He hasn’t been very well the last couple of days. Give him some time. I’ll try talking to him as well.”

“What do you mean? Did something happen?” I ask in confusion.

“He’ll tell you when he’s ready.” is all he says and I frown.

“He’s not dying, is he?” I question, terrified of the thought of losing him.

“No, he isn’t.” David laughs and I sigh, relieved.

He pats my knee and then gets up. “I’ll see you in a few hours.”

“Thank you,” I smile weakly when he reaches the door. “For everything.”

“That’s my job, baby girl.” He responds and then disappears.

 

I spend the rest of my night cleaning and tidying up the mess I made in the living room a few hours ago. When I’m done, I pack a few more things I had forgotten to pack. After I’ve finished, I crawl onto my bed and try to catch some sleep.

My phones starts ringing a little after midnight and I rush to find it. It might be Chris calling me. Instead, it’s a text from David who’s letting me know that he’s on his way with Dylan to pick me up for the airport. I put on a pair of comfortable jeans and a black top since I plan on sleeping during the flight.

I carry my bags out the house and log in on Twitter while waiting for my manager.

“Getting ready to go to the airport! Who’s coming to the first show tomorrow night?” I tweet and then a black car pulls over.

We don’t talk at all during the drive which doesn’t help my situation since Chris and his mean words come back to my mind, driving me crazy. What did David mean though when he said that he’s going through a lot lately? He would tell me if something bad happened in his life, right? I sigh. It seems that he wouldn’t. My head is spinning from all this thinking and I feel sick; both my stomach and my head hurting.

“Are you alright?” David asks. “You look like a ghost.”

“Thanks.” I reply sarcastically.

“Let’s hope there aren’t any paparazzi at the airport. The last thing we want is rumors going around.”

 

Of course though, nothings seems to go right in my life anymore since there are hundreds of people at the airport, waiting for us. As soon as Dylan drops us there, we’re surrounded by paparazzi and fans who are screaming in our faces and taking pictures with their flashing cameras. Luckily, our security guards rush to us and help us make our way, away from the crowd. They lead us to our private plane, where the rest of our crew is waiting.

“Ashley!” Emma calls my name all excited when she sees me. Her long hair is down in loose curls and she’s wearing a long white dress. As always she looks incredible. When she comes closer to me, her smile fades.

“Were you crying? Is everything alright?” She questions, worried.

“I – Chris -” I try my best not to start crying again but when she hugs me, I just break down.

 

After calming down once again, we are told to sit down and wear our seat-belts since the plane is about to take off.

 

We’ve been up in the air for almost half an hour when Harry comes and sits next to me, on the empty seat that’s next to mine.

“Hey,” He says and smiles shyly.

“Hi,” I smile back at him and then turn around to face him instead of the window.

“How are you?” He hesitates, scratching the back of his neck.

“Not very well but it doesn’t matter. What about you?” I answer. My tone is lower than usual due to the screaming and crying.

“Just worried about you.” He admits and my heart aches.

He coughs and looks awkwardly away before adding: “Did you and Chris fight again… after I left?” He questions a few seconds later and I’m grateful because I had no idea what to say to him after his previous statement. I just nod.

“I know I’m the one who caused it and for that I’m so sorry-”

“Don’t blame yourself.” I interrupt him.

He shakes his head, biting his lip. “Still, I shouldn’t have come to your place earlier.” He continues and then looks away.

“Harry, it’s not your fault. It’s just that Chris got jealous even though I’ve told him a hundred times that I don’t have feelings for you.” I explain and for a second I think I see Harry frown.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-”

“It’s alright.” He assures me and then gets up and leaves, without saying anything else.

I’m taken aback by his reaction and I don’t know what to make out of it. I’m so tired though so I just decide to not think of anything and just try to relax. Maybe even try to take a nap.

 

“Ash, get up. We’re here.” David wakes me up a few hours later.

It’s still really dark outside and I can’t wait to get to the hotel, take a hot shower and then finally get some proper sleep.

There aren’t many people at the airport waiting for us –probably less than fifty- so they let us take pictures and sign autographs.

I try my best to avoid Harry as much as possible because the last thing I want, is for Chris to see more pictures of me and Harry kissing, in magazines or on the internet. It won’t help at all what we’re going through.

I’m relieved that he doesn’t push it and keeps his distance. I’m also a bit disappointed.

Another half an hour goes by before we’re finally at the hotel we’re staying the next three days. We all enter the lobby together and wait to get our keys before we’re free for the rest of the night.

My night though is ruined when I’m told that I’m going to stay in the same room with Harry.

“What if someone hears that you two aren’t sleeping in the same hotel room? You’re trying to convince people you are a couple. We can’t risk it.” David explained, before handing Harry our key. I know there’s no point in fighting with him about this and I also don’t want to make a scene in front of Harry, who’s probably already mad at me.

Harry follows me quietly to our room and we both freeze in our positions when we see that there’s only a double bed. Of course there’s only one… we’re a couple.

The room is quite big. The walls are painted a very nice shade of beige and the one that’s behind the huge double bed –I’m sharing with Harry- unlike the rest of them, is dark brown. There are lots of beige and golden pillows on the bed and also a beautiful white rose on it. The room has also a really huge floor-to-ceiling window, through which, you can see the city. On the one side of it, there’s an armchair and on the other, a wooden antique desk.

I drop my suitcase next to the closet and then start unpacking a few of my things, in silence.

“Do you want to be the first that takes a shower?” Harry asks after he’s done with his stuff.

“If you don’t mind.” I respond with hesitation.

“No, you can go.” He simply says and then turns on the television.

Wondering if he’s mad at me, I grab my toiletries and a pair of PJs and head to the bathroom.

I lock the door behind me even though I know that Harry isn’t going to do anything inappropriate. The thought sends a shiver down my spine and I want to slap myself for thinking that way about him.

Looking at the mirror, I’m surprised by the way I look. My hair is all messy and my eyes are red and puffy; the bags under them, making it obvious I’ve been crying.

Stripping my clothes off, I get in the shower. I turn the water on and wait a few seconds before it gets warm enough for me to step under it. When the water slashes me, I suck in a huge breath of air.

Washing my body and hair, I almost feel all the tiredness and anxiety brush off. It’s calming and I spend several minutes just under the warm water, thinking of everything and nothing at the same time. When I remember that Harry needs warm water for his shower as well, I step out and put my PJs on, after drying my body using a towel.

When I’m finished I return to the main room. Harry has taken a few of the pillows that were on the bed as well as some duvets and has laid them on the floor.

“I thought I’d sleep on the floor and leave the bed for you.” He informs me and then walks into the bathroom.

I sigh and then lie on the bed. What happened to the friendship thing he wanted us to have? He has barely talked to me after the incident at my house.

Turning off the light, I take my phone and quickly type a tweet: “Thanks for the overwhelming welcome at the airport Canada! Can’t wait for the show tomorrow! #MuchLove”

I place my phone on the nightstand that’s next to the bed and close my eyes, making up a nice scenario in my head, as I always do when I’m trying to fall asleep at night.

 

When Harry comes out of the bathroom, he’s just wearing a pair of black boxers. His hair is wet and water drips from his messy curls to his shoulders. I can’t help but stare at his bare chest that’s covered with tattoos. I shake my head in an attempt to get rid of all those thoughts.

When he lies on the floor, I feel extremely guilty. “Do you want to sleep on the bed?” I ask and then quickly add: “It’s because we have a show tomorrow and we need to sleep well and I really don’t think you can do that on the floor.”

“No, I’ll be alright.” He answers and then covers himself with a white sheet.

“I insist.”

He thinks about it for a second, his eyes wandering to the ceiling. “Won’t Chris get mad?”

I bite my lip. “Fuck Chris. He’ll get mad anyway.” I shrug and Harry chuckles. I pat the right side of the bed, encouraging him to come.

Harry gets up and lies next to me. His body radiates warm and I can feel my cheeks turning red. This is going to be a long night.

 

It’s been ten minutes since Harry has laid next to me and I still haven’t fallen asleep. I just stare at the ceiling.

“I can’t,” Harry says, turning to his side to face me.

“Can’t what?” I ask, confused.

“Not kiss you.” He simply says and I stare at him, surprised. “I mean, I want to so badly and you’re lying inches away from me.” He continues while looking at my lips.

“Then kiss me.” I mumble and Chris’s face appears in my mind. I shove the thoughts of him away.

Using my elbows, I get up and sit on the bed. Harry does the same and positions himself on top of me. He brings his mouth to mine, his tongue caressing mine. His lips are soft and so incredibly perfect, I know that if he continues like this, I won’t be able to stop him. His mouth moves from mine to right below my ear and then my neck. It feels like the whole room is spinning and is now ten degrees hotter. He kisses my neck again and I’m sure there’s isn’t a nerve ending in my body that doesn’t feel it. From my head, which is screaming for more, to my toes.

He takes a deep breath and moves away, making me frown.

“This feels so good, yet so wrong.” He says, pressing his forehead against mine. I try to speak but no words come out of my mouth. “You still have a boyfriend, Ash.” He adds and then gets off the bed.

“I want us to do that when I’m sure you feel the same way.” Wearing a pair of jeans and a t-shirt he rushes out of the room, leaving me speechless and panting for air.

 

A knock on the door, wakes me up. I groan and pull a pillow over my head.

“Coming.” Harry yells to whoever’s at the door, in his morning voice. I turn around to look at him. To my surprise, Harry is lying on the floor. Memories from last night come to my mind and I touch my lips with my fingers.

No, it can’t be. Did I dream the whole thing?

The right side of the bed, that’s made-up, confirms it for me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I can't even begin to explain how sorry I am for the late update! I had no Internet for the last few days which means no access to Wattpad or Twitter! Hope you understand :) Anyway, here's chapter seven! Hope you enjoy it! Chapter eight will be up on Saturday. Don't forget to vote & comment ❤ I love reading your tweets. So, don't forget to follow @PretendingFF for updates, edits, etc. (I auto-follow everyone back on that account so it's almost like a free follow xo)


	8. Chapter 8

“Good morning!” David greets the both of us while entering our hotel room.

“Hey.” I trail off, while rubbing the sleep of my eyes and getting off bed, my head still spinning from the inappropriate dream I had last night.

It was so vivid though and it felt so real. I can almost still feels Harry’s hands on my hips and taste his mouth on mine. I shake my head in an attempt to get rid of the disturbing thoughts… and it is not working very well, especially when Harry is standing just a few feet away from me, in just his boxers.

“I came to give you today’s schedule, but first,” he takes a deep breath. “I need to talk to you in private.” He motions towards me.

“I’m going to take a shower.” Harry says awkwardly and heads to the bathroom, after grabbing a pair of black tight jeans and a simple white t-shirt from the closet.

“What’s wrong?” I ask my chubby manager when I can hear the water running in the bathroom.

“Photos from last night, of you outside Chris’s house, have been all over Twitter the past couple of hours. It seems like a few fans where there when you decided to visit him. People are starting to believe that you and Harry are dating for publicity.”

I close my eyes and try to calm down myself. I’m sure I had looked around, I had checked if there were any people on the street and there weren’t. I sigh, knowing one thing. If pictures of me outside my boyfriend’s house –ex-boyfriend’s?– leaked online, this means stricter rules.

David seems thoughtful. “What I’m asking for, is for you to not see Chris for a couple weeks.”

I open my mouth to speak but he interrupts me. “I know you two have things to sort out and that you aren’t in best terms right now but it’s not like we have any other choice.”

“Alright.” I simply reply. Even though, I need to talk to Chris about our fight, I’m hoping that these couple of weeks will give us both time to think. David seems taken aback from my calm reaction.

“Can I call him and text him at least?” I say and then bite the inside of my bottom lip.

David laughs and nods his head. “Sure. Just don’t lose your phone.”

Harry walks out of the bathroom, finally wearing clothes. His hair is messy and I have this sudden urge to walk to him and run my fingers through his curls.

“So,” David begins and pulls a paper out of his pocket. “You don’t have anything to do this morning but I suggest you make a public appearance together. Try going shopping or something?” He suggests and then looks back to his paper, reading further. “And tonight,” He turns to Harry. “You and the boys are invited at a late night show. As for you, Ash, you have an interview for a magazine scheduled.” He smiles and we both nod to let him know that we have understood.

He looks at his watch. “It’s already 9A.M. I believe you need to get ready.” He says and then waves goodbye at us.

“Do you want to go shopping or do something else?” Harry mumbles, while scratching the back of his neck.

“Although, I need to buy a few things, it’s up to you.” I smile shyly. This is awkward.

“Shopping it is.” He replies and a wide smile stretches across his face.

“Give me a few minutes to get ready.” I say and rush to the closet to pick an outfit.

“Take your time.” He assures me and then grabs his phone. I thank him while grabbing a black tight t-shirt and an orange with black lines skirt.

Heading to the bathroom, I wash my face, brush my teeth and comb my messy hair. After failing epically at trying to bride my hair, I decide to let it down. My bangs are a bit too long now so I push them at the side.

I apply some foundation on my face and then mascara on my eyelashes. I don’t have time to try applying eyeliner as well -not that I could manage a straight line anyway- so I go back to the room Harry is.

“Ready?” He asks when he sees me.

“Yeah, we can go.” I say. “But give me a second to find my phone.” I continue while searching for my phone between the sheets.

“There you go.” He hands me my phone. “It had fallen on the floor.” He adds and I thank him.

I check for any missed calls or text messages but there aren’t any. Should I text Chris first? I decide against it. He was the wrong one. I put my phone in my small black back and head out with Harry.

 

“We should go get some breakfast first.” He suggests when we are in his car and I suddenly feel hungry, remembering that I haven’t eaten since yesterday morning.

“Do you want anything specific?” He asks me and I shake my head “no”.

“You aren’t very cheerful today, like usual.” He points out.

“I’m just tired and upset after what happened with Chris last night.” I explain. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be bothering you with my relationship problems.” I add quickly, looking down.

“You’re not.” He smiles, not taking his eyes from the road.

“You’re being very understanding. Thank you.”

“I’m sure you would do the same if you were me.” He says and I inform him that I would.

 

Harry pulls over at a small coffee shop after a few minutes. It’s really beautiful inside. Its brick walls and dark wooden chairs making it really welcoming. All of it is in earthy colors but what makes me love it, is the wall that’s in the back of the shop which is a ceiling-to-floor bookcase.

“Like it?” Harry smiles at me when I stop looking around in awe.

“Yes! Can we stay for a while?” I practically beg him and he laughs.

“Sure.”

“There aren’t many people here though.” I point out. Why would he take me to a shop where there aren’t many people when we are trying to make a public appearance and draw attention to us?

“I remembered what you said at the restaurant.” He responds and an “Oh” escapes my lips.

"Do you like this place?" Harry asks when we get comfortable.

"No," I reply as I pick up the menu and open it.

"Oh," He seems surprised and confused. "Why? It's nice." He says and I take a deep breath, thinking about the promise I've made about giving it a try.

"It's just... I don't like such expensive places. I prefer simpler things. Especially on dates." I try to explain, not ready to confess to him my family's story and how we were really poor.

"I'll have that in mind, next time." He smiles and I look down, blushing.

“How did you even find this place?” I ask, trying to change the subject.

His smile fades and I immediately regret asking. “I’m sorry-”

“It’s alright.” He interrupts me. “Uhm… my ex-girlfriend had brought me here a few times. I fell in love with that place from the first time.” He explains as we walk to the barista to order and it makes me wonder why he would bring me at a place that he reminds him of his ex-girlfriend and make memories of them come back.

Harry orders some orange juice and I go with black coffee. A few seconds after he pays, he also decides to get us some chocolate muffins.

“Why did you break up?” I ask, as we make our way to a table near the large window. “If you don’t mind me asking.”

“I don’t.” He reassures me with a smile. “It just didn’t work out. I wanted to protect her and keep her away from the spotlight.” He pauses, collecting his thoughts. “I never announced that I was dating her and we never made public appearances.” A bitter chuckle escapes his lips and he shakes his head. “It was alright at first but after a while it just got really hard and suffocating.” He emphasizes the word “suffocating” and I assume that she had probably said that to him.

“Did you love her?” I ask him, wanting to learn more.

“Of course I did. Part of me still does.” He admits and my heart aches.

Jealous there, Ash? My subconscious asks and I shake my head in an attempt to make her shut up.

“Try the muffin. It’s incredible.” He says after a few minutes and pushes the plate towards me.

I grab my fork and focus on my breakfast but I can’t help my thoughts from wandering to that mysterious girl that broke Harry’s heart.

 

After we’ve had breakfast, we finally head to the mall for shopping. Harry doesn’t want to buy anything so I pretty much drag him with me from one clothes store to the other.

We’re now in a shop I‘ve never heard of, that has every day woman clothes. I do my shopping while he takes photos with his fans and tries to sign as many autographs as he can.

“You should try that on.” He appears behinds me, holding a pink floral dress. “It’s cute.”

“Thanks.” I smile at him and take it from his hands while giving him a peck kiss on the lips. He knows there are people watching us, but he still seems surprised.

 

“Do you mind if I shower first? I need to be ready for the show in half an hour.” Harry asks politely when we’ve returned at our hotel room.

“No, go ahead.” I say while dropping on the floor the heavy bags I’m carrying.

He excuses himself and I lay on bed after taking my shoes off.

I decide to log on in Twitter and interact with my fans and reply to those who I met a few hours ago at the mall.

I purposely retweet the pictures of fans that have both me and Harry in them.

@AshleyThompson: How do you feel about this picture?

A tweet reads and my curiosity gets the best of me and I decide to click on the link.

My heart drops when I see a picture of Chris and Caroline, laughing together on the street. Chris has a huge smile on his face. His hand is around her waist, while she looks up at him, compete adoration and pride in her eyes.

“Bitch.” I say out loud.

Even though, my subconscious is screaming at me to not reply to that tweet -because I will sure regret it later- I ignore her.

They want drama, don’t they? They told us to try to make ourselves be on every magazine and on every other social media platform. What’s better than a little Twitter fight?

Oh, I’m so going to get in trouble. I think to myself when I click the “Tweet” button.


	9. Author's note

I just wanted to let you know that I won't be continuing this story. I've lost all interest in writing about Harry, Ashley and Chris and there is no point in writing bad updates just to keep this going.  
I won't delete it though because I may someday in the future finish it.


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